Hi Babes! I am starting this mini series of blogs with a topic I hope helps people understand that its okay to be different. Whether you are trying to accept some or you’re trying to accept yourself.
I have struggled a lot with the fact that I am “different” from my family. I come from a traditional Hispanic family. The women are to find a husband, cook, clean, bear children. That’s nice and all but times are changing. From a very young age (elementary school) I knew I didn’t want to give birth to a child. If I wanted to become a mother one day, I would adopt. My views on becoming a parent have changed, I’ll be speaking about that in a separate blog. As I got older, I came to the realization that not only would I never give my parents biological children but I would also never marry a man. It was very hard, for both my parents and I, to come to terms with this. My family was not on board. AT ALL. It was very hurtful. We seek our parents’ approval and when we don’t have it, it can hurt. Now, I had to make a choice. Either I keep living this life that my family thought I should live, or I accept myself and start living my authentic life. And guess what? I started my own family. My wife and my boy (Bruno the Husky/German Shepard mix). I made the family that I envisioned, a reality. I am extremely blessed to have my little family.
Now, I believe that sometimes, we have to experience things in order to understand or accept them. I had to come to terms with who I was in order to accept myself. For my mother, she had to see that I was in a loving, healthy, committed relationship, in order to rid all the negative connotations, about being gay, from her mind. She accepts me fully. I couldn’t be happier knowing that she is now more open minded. Now, I want to share a couple of things to keep in mind when learning to accept others:
Allow others/yourself to be different
Imagine if the everyone in the world was the same, how boring would that be? We all have unique characteristics that make us different. Even though we know these differences are good, they can still make us feel uncomfortable. We may try to change these differences in others or ourselves. Being open-minded, allows us to be more empathetic and accepting of differences. We should try to get to know each other and focus on the similarities. Then, we may find ourselves becoming closer to each other and able to accept our differences.
Not judging others too quickly
I will be the first to admit, that this is something I am constantly working on. It’s easy to look around and point out what we consider flaws in someone. But being empathetic, even though it is harder, allows us to accept each other. Nothing good can come from judging. I have really been trying to connect with other women recently. It is so important to me to lift each other up. When we accept others and ourselves as we are, we realize that we are just doing our best. It goes back to that old saying “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all”. I must admit, a big reason why I started my Instagram account was because I felt I would be judged by my family and friends for having nice things. HOW CRAZY DOES THAT SOUND? I shouldn’t feel like I’m being judged for having nice things. But I am so grateful I started Lux And Pups, I have met so many wonderful people who share the same obsession for handbags and lux goodies as I do!
If you have made it this far, thank you my friend! I appreciate you taking time out of your day to read this blog post. If I can help at least one person to accept themselves or to become more open minded in order accept someone else, I would be so happy.
“I am far more confident now because of the love people have showered on me. Their acceptance is what keeps me going.”